gutterpuck trannie

November 20 2007

homeless-trannie.jpg

i’m not sayin’ living in the city is better than living in the country. i’m just saying it’s different.

in manhattan, one of my neighborhood homeless people was a trannie. but a very specific kind of trannie. she was a goth, marilyn manson, trent renzor-type trannsexual homeless person. she was not just an older gutterpuck. no, she was the prerequisite koo-koo as well… muttering to herself, applying kohl in a 3-inch radius around her eyes, carrying all her stuff in a laundry cart, sleeping over a subway grate kinda koo-koo.

…oh, and a fetish latex corset. she always wore her fetish latex corset.

i have not seen her equivalent in asheville yet. but i did see something today that i have not witnessed in my life journey so far.

the cashier at the asheville airport parking lot has a pet cat set-up outside her booth.

the cat has a blanket and food bowl in front of the cashier’s window as you pull up to pay for parking. it’s a black cat with white paws. as i approached the booth, the cat got up from the driveway, stretched, and sauntered over to her bed. i may be exaggerating the cat’s bitchiness, but she seemed genuinely perturbed that i made her move.

of course, the cashier was oblivious that any of this might be considered unusual. she just took my $2 and asked if i needed a receipt. since a goal of living here is not to upset the locals, i just said, ‘no, thanks’ and drove away without mentioning the cat.

as you fellow ashevilleans fly home for the holidays, keep a lookout for the cashier’s cat. i’m sure running over a cat during kwanzaa is not kosher.

oh, and if you find out the cat’s name, please let me know. i’m curious.

out.

ps

yes, i know the typical spelling is ‘tranny,’ but i think ‘trannie’ is more feminine. that’s the point, right?

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