renter prejudice

November 13 2007


i woke up this past sunday to a cool, clear day. very nice. i open the blinds in the bedroom to survey the homestead.

i saw something unsuspected. the neighbor in the rented house across the street was digging a hole in his side yard.

why is someone digging a hole at 8am on a sunday morning?

let’s just say he doesn’t seem like an avid gardener… about 27 years old, shaved head, florida plates on his truck and amateurish shoveling technique. in a t-shirt and fleece vest, he’s digging a hole with one hand, the other hand shoved into his pocket to keep warm against the cold.

i was intrigued.

the hole ended up being about 1 foot across and about a foot deep. he went to the far side of the house and came back with something in the shovel. whatever it was, it was beige about 8 inches by 4 inches. he dumped it into the hole and covered it up with dirt. then he shuffled back into the house.

commonsense tells me that it was a mouse he caught in the house or his daughter’s pet gerbil. BUT, why would he bury a mouse he caught in the kitchen? wouldn’t he just put it in the trash? his daughter is about 1, why would he bury a pet 4 feet from the kid’s sandbox? first of all, the kid wasn’t with him to witness the burial ceremony for a beloved pet. so it wasn’t to give closure to the kid’s grief. plus, would a parent put a decaying animal within crawl distance of his child’s play space?

my theory is that he finally got feed up by the constant nagging by his chain-smoking, banana-clip-wearing common-law wife; chopped her up and is disposing of her a little at a time. maybe he decided to start with her left hand.

who wouldn’t be tired of hearing, “i hate this fucking place; fags and hippies everywhere… when are you gonna to get a job? …i never should’a left tampa. it’s fuckin’ cold… my momma said you were a loser. i should’a listened to her. i should’a stayed with dwayne… stop buyin’ so much fuckin’ bud…i’m tired of lil’brittnie’s cryin’. i’m tired. you go see what’s wrong with her.  …fuck… why do i have to do everything ’round here? …why did i ever listen to you? …fuck you, you fucker.”

i’m fed up just imaging her whiny chatter.

ok, my theory may be wrong. but i’ll never think he was just planting tulips for spring.


%d bloggers like this: